Massage Meets Community: The Tocar Spa Story

A brutal winter, nonstop school pivots, and the kind of stress that sneaks into your shoulders and never leaves, that’s where this conversation starts. Then it opens into something bigger: what it really takes to build a wellness business that lasts in Columbia, Maryland, and why massage therapy is shifting from “nice-to-have” to part of a real health routine.

I’m joined by Stephen Conti, owner of Tocar Spa in Howard County, and his origin story is the definition of a zigzag. He takes us from growing up in PG County to UMD, from early career twists to going all-in on massage, and finally to opening his own brick-and-mortar spa. We talk about what clients can expect at Tocar Spa, why he intentionally avoids a sterile franchise vibe, and how his team customizes massage, facials, waxing, and specialty services like four-hand massage, Lomi Lomi, and couples massage lessons.

Stephen also shares a side of the industry most people never see: he serves as chair of the Maryland State Board of Massage Therapy. We get into how licensing and regulation work, why small business owners suddenly start paying attention to policy, and how accessible local delegates and county leaders can be when you actually pick up the phone. We also address the hard topic of illicit massage establishments and how that connects to human trafficking prevention work right here in our community.

If you care about wellness, small business in Howard County, or how local policy shapes your daily life, hit play. 

Don’t just listen—go experience it. 💆‍♀️✨ 

Head to https://tocarspa.com/experience/ to book your session. 🌿💫

Follow Tocar Spa to stay connected and see what real, community-driven wellness looks like:
 📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tocarspa/ 📲

 👍 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TocarSpa 💙

 ▶️ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC0Y9huGLlnwAbFOSbqBm-OA 🎥

Transcript

Welcome And Winter Check-In

SPEAKER_01 0:00

Hey friends, and welcome to Mom Talk Maryland. I'm your host, Claire Duarte, founder of the Columbia Mom. And this is your spot for real conversations, local love, and a whole lot of community. Whether you're folding laundry, running errands, or hiding in your car for some peace and quiet, let's dive in. Well, cheers to Tuesday morning. Cheers, mate. Um actually you get a you get a special podcast because uh today is my last day of 37. Uh I got my B day tomorrow, so we can kind of celebrate together.

SPEAKER_00 0:30

Happy uh early birthday.

SPEAKER_01 0:31

Happy early birthday. We got some good weather today, you know.

SPEAKER_00 0:35

I know, I know.

SPEAKER_01 0:37

Yeah, I yeah, I'm definitely gonna get outside. I have I'm like, my uh my impulsivity is like, do I want to do this? Do I want to do that? Do I want to so we're gonna see where the wind takes me today.

SPEAKER_00 0:46

Okay, anytime outside is good. I know, exactly.

SPEAKER_01 0:50

I know, I know.

SPEAKER_00 0:51

We had a brutal winter.

SPEAKER_01 0:53

We did. We really did. We were I was just talking about that with a friend about like, you know, mentally how tough winter can be, and then just like the cold and the I think the weather just kind of went like up down, up dumb, down, up down, you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_00 1:04

The biggest thing for me was all of the snow days and then the lack of decisiveness about what's happening in school. Oh the snow, then wait a second. Oh, now you're off tomorrow, you're off tomorrow, now you're off for the week. And it's like so brutal. Pivoting with that. It's tough for business too.

SPEAKER_01 1:20

Oh. Yes. Seriously. I mean, you have a brick and mortar, but like even for me too, if like, you know, filmings, calls, meetings, clients, you know, it's just the ripple effect. And and for our health, so like I said, my kids are in one's in the county, one's private, so like, you know, for like I think a total of like 16 weeks, so like you would have the snow days, and then like one of my kids would have a day off already in that week with the snow day, and then the next one would have a day off. Like, yeah, it was just mayhem. But you know what? We're here.

SPEAKER_00 1:49

We are here, we're here.

Stephen’s Career Origin Story

SPEAKER_01 1:51

Nothing is wrong. I know. Um, well, Steven, I'm so excited to have you here. I've known you, gosh, like I feel like we became like, I don't even like want to call it like real friends of your because I've known you for longer than that. Like you've you've had your business. I know, exactly. Like, you know, from the our chamber circles and things like that. Um, but you own an awesome spot right here in Columbia. So tell us um a little bit, A, of course, about your business, about yourself, but um one of my kickoff questions that I always loved writing is I love an origin story. And I love when I sit down with people because everyone gives me so many cool different variations, and you know, and I love like however you interpret your origin story. Some people think like whether that's like how you know if you had a lifelong passion in this, or you know, I love the zigzagging of like how you got there. I'm just painting that picture because I've just had so many cool different conversations lately. So that's that's my biggest nugget. But take the floor and let's hear from you.

SPEAKER_00 2:48

Um so my name is Stephen Conti. I'm born and raised in well, I was born in DC. Born Mother's Day.

SPEAKER_01 2:58

Wow.

SPEAKER_00 2:59

4 39 p.m. So my god celebrate my birthday every year with Mother's Day in mind. Yeah, my wife. So it's an interesting time to be born on Mother's Day, I think.

SPEAKER_01 3:09

That certainly is.

SPEAKER_00 3:11

I tell my I'm the best gift you've ever had. That's right. Um, but born in DC, grew up in Prince George's County. I'll call it PG County because I'm from PG. Yep. Um went to Roosevelt, Eleanor Roosevelt, which was one of the great science and tech programs in the county, and then went right down the street to the University of Maryland College Park. So I guess this is a looping story, but I'll try to bring it all home.

SPEAKER_01 3:35

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 3:35

I started in a College Park scholars program.

SPEAKER_01 3:38

Oh, nice.

SPEAKER_00 3:38

As a business kind of concentration, you know, you have to business concentration. So by the second semester, you had to at minimum have a 3.0 GPA to get into the business school.

SPEAKER_01 3:51

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 3:52

Um I was messing around my first year.

SPEAKER_01 3:54

As we do. Which made it As we do.

SPEAKER_00 3:57

Which made it not possible. So I had to make a shift and went to com so communications. I finished there in 2004. Um went right into massage school. Right after I graduated, um, finished in 2006 and then took a break. Like I didn't start immediately, I didn't actually get licensed until 2008. So I graduated in 2006, didn't get my full Maryland massage license until 08.

SPEAKER_02 4:22

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_00 4:22

Um so now 18 years of practice. Um I work for a law firm. Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_01 4:29

Um I work for a law firm too.

SPEAKER_00 4:31

Yeah, I was legal marketing.

SPEAKER_01 4:33

Oh, okay. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 4:35

Not an attorney, but I did legal marketing. So everything on the back end of business, which I learned and after two and a half years span there, yeah, has got me where I am. I'm talking about, we used to use Quark. So Quark is the InDesign competitor at the time. Oh, yeah. I was probably phased out now, but I did um trade books, we put together programs, I did website stuff, print marketing, I traveled, promotional orders, we ran a suite at the uh Nats and the uh so I was into everything which in in a business sense has made me super prepared for also the client side of things.

SPEAKER_02 5:17

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 5:18

So then I went to work for a franchise, and while I was also working for the law firm, and I said, I don't want to put this into town anymore. So let me trade it in for khakis and a polo shirt and get to work. Um I quit the law firm and I started doing franchise work for a couple years, and I quit that and uh joined in with a friend of mine in a rental agreement at a uh office building in Tower County. So that was 2012. I went full time with massage.

SPEAKER_01 5:50

Nice.

SPEAKER_00 5:51

So we are well in ten years there.

SPEAKER_02 5:55

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 5:56

Then I moved to my own space where it was the own, my own brick and mortar, my only name on the door. Um, and I've been there for three and a half years now.

SPEAKER_02 6:04

Got it.

SPEAKER_00 6:05

Um so now I'm getting to the point where I want to put the suit back on.

SPEAKER_01 6:09

Isn't that funny?

SPEAKER_00 6:10

And I want to do funny networking and business development and like everything I was doing before that I I said I'm done with this. Now I want to do it again. So I'm buying suits again and I'm, you know.

SPEAKER_01 6:21

But you know what's funny? See, and this again, this is why I love origin stories. This is also why I love sitting down and do the podcast, because it's like, you know, especially like when like you and I are both out in the community a lot. Like, you know, when I'm when you're out in the community and you're either at the businesses establishment, or you and I both do a lot of networking, you can kind of see that side of business, right? But like you don't always hear these stories, right? Like the how you got there and you know, all the the weird zigzagging that we're talking about. And and I actually think that makes so much sense with you because I mean every time I've seen you've always been so nicely put together. You you network so well, and that makes so much sense knowing like your background at you know, Turps and Scholars. My husband was in um oh god. What I think was the honors program, Denton Denton.

SPEAKER_00 7:05

Denton. So there was a Cambridge community, then it's a Denton community. Yes. And yeah, that was the super smart people. We were like kind of kind of smart.

SPEAKER_01 7:12

Oh, I well, I was not I was not in that program. I was the second semester, what it was it called? Freshman connection kid. That was me. Yeah. So um I'm I'm a moco girly. You don't need to explain the abbreviations. We're Maryland kids through and through. Um, but no, I think that makes so much sense that like you were like heavy in the business like world, you know what I mean? I think, and then you like so many of us, right? Like post-graduation, we're kind of like doing because we're you know taught to be straight lace, we're taught to, you know, go after the ambitious thing to be successful, to be the provider, da-da-da-da-da, right? But then along the way, like we're not taught to go after our passions, though when we're kids, we're taught that. And then once you get to high school, they like, oh no, no, no, no, that's cool, but put that away.

SPEAKER_00 7:58

But do something in this box.

SPEAKER_01 7:59

Right. You have the right. It's like we preach passions forever, and and we're still doing that to our kids, you know, dream big, right? And then so it's like in our 20s, or frankly, up until whenever we find it, right? We're kind of like in that like self-disc reach self-discovery process that we are trying to give ourselves permissions to, not because necessarily our parents couldn't and wouldn't, but they were trying to help us to be successful, correct, in their vision of success, right? So it's not even blaming them because the same thing that they were putting on us is what their generation was putting on them, you know what I mean? And so, um, anyway, so it's like now you've you know you established your business, right? And then so you've kind of like can check the box, okay. Now I've I've gone after my passion, and now it's like you're almost like kind of going back to your roots.

unknown 8:45

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 8:46

I mean, it was I literally I have binders of stuff from high school and looking through some of the notes I had in there. This is 1999.

SPEAKER_01 8:55

I love that you're dropping dates.

SPEAKER_00 8:57

I love that you're dropping dates. I want to open up a spa. So it's been it's been in my spirit forever. Wow. And just getting exposed to touch and healthy touch, like right through sports, like played football, yeah, trainers and things of that nature. But I just always enjoyed it. I enjoyed how you know doing massage or being massage felt.

SPEAKER_02 9:21

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 9:21

Um, and also enjoyed, and I still do to this day, enjoy the the reaction after the session, like when people come out of the treatment room, like Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 9:30

Right.

SPEAKER_00 9:31

Yeah. I didn't know I needed it that much, but that was amazing. It's and I want to do this more. And the conversation shifts from oh, this is a luxury to this is being now part of my wellness and part of my routine for me to function in this society with all the craziness and all the stress that's going on.

SPEAKER_01 9:50

Yeah. Oh my gosh, that's so true. Um, and you know, and now you're so like involved in her cat. Like you actually on our elevator ride up, you're like listing off all. I mean, I knew that you were integrated and heavily networked, but okay, but it's like tell me all the things that you do now outside of too much and um I'm my my phrase now, people say, How are you doing?

How Regulation Shapes Small Business

SPEAKER_00 10:13

I said, I'm busy trying not to be as busy. So I'm trying to work systems and work uh off ramps to kind of have more of the free time that I want to have, that I say I want to have. Right. Um but right now I'm the chair of the state massage therapy board.

SPEAKER_01 10:30

That's amazing.

SPEAKER_00 10:31

So it's a regulatory body that regulates all the licensed professionals in the state of Maryland. So anyone who has a healthcare or um uh a Maryland state of Department of Health issued license, we regulate those folks, and that's disciplinary issues and everything in between. Anything that relates to them being licensed by the state to do massage, I'm the chair of that board. And I've been a chair for the last two years.

SPEAKER_02 10:59

Wow.

SPEAKER_00 11:00

So I just renewed renominated. So this is the second governor that's nominated me.

SPEAKER_02 11:06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 11:07

So if everything pans out, it will be eight years of experience in the regulatory space at the state level. So we've been to Annapolis, we've testified concept papers on bills. We've had about four different bills that I've personally been involved with that have passed.

SPEAKER_01 11:23

Incredible.

SPEAKER_00 11:25

This and I and I talked to my executive director about it, and it's like you didn't think that you wanted to do this or wanted to be.

SPEAKER_01 11:33

Isn't that funny?

SPEAKER_00 11:34

And you said once you got into it, it blew my mind how interesting and fantastic this world is of regulation. And I thought it was kind of dull. Like, well, writing legislation and statutes.

SPEAKER_01 11:48

Or just like, you know, like you obviously you need a license to operate and blah blah blah. Like you those are your administrative checkboxes.

SPEAKER_00 11:54

But all the mechanisms behind the scenes that make it possible, yeah, and all of the nuance how regulations are created, how it's in response to bad actors or things that are going on that need to be addressed, right? That blew my mind. So I'm I'm a hundred percent like involved in like policy now, which is it's just it's fascinating. So that's one thing I do, right? Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 12:17

So wait, quick pause real quick, just because I um one thing I've noticed for myself, again, like I feel like I still feel like I very much very l know very little about like government and politics, but the more that I've been in business and networking in the area and obviously kind of getting to know more like delegates, governors, like you know, you start to I think becoming a business owner forces you to now start to pay attention to all these um government and like like political terms because you're like, oh, because now that really affects me.

SPEAKER_00 12:46

It really affects me.

SPEAKER_01 12:47

Affected my personal taxes, but now I see how this really affects me. And it, you know, and then when you're in the room specifically too, it's like you're seeing how it also because not all things might directly um I mean, yes, it does directly affect your business, but you're I'm also seeing how it affects my peers, my community members, you know, like I've seen like so many things that are, you know, affecting like the restaurant association, um, realtors association. You know what I mean? So it forces you to start paying attention to things.

SPEAKER_00 13:12

Everything.

SPEAKER_01 13:13

Yeah, so I I'm with you in the sense of like, you know, so now I started to attend some of those legislative events because it's I'm with you. It's interesting. And because, you know, I'm like, and it has made me a more active person in voting and and you know, putting your voice out there because um, like, yes, on the personal side, but like now, like this is like how we're running our business and things like that, and how much of it affects our whole community.

SPEAKER_00 13:39

100%.

SPEAKER_01 13:40

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 13:40

And just tapping into actually talking to the regulators, yeah. It's like you I don't know, in my mind, I always see like the federal side, like these people are probably unreachable. They're not taking your taking your calls, but the state level at least, and then the local level, I've called my county council person and spoken to him directly. I've talked to Howard County delegates and senators directly. So you have access, I think people maybe just don't realize it. Really is a phone call away. If you you have to make the effort though, but right they are very responsive to the constituent needs. And I I never thought that way. I thought, oh, well, they're just doing what they want to do.

SPEAKER_01 14:21

I know.

SPEAKER_00 14:22

But now you see it's like they really move to the the beat of the constituents.

SPEAKER_01 14:26

They do. And again, I I feel like I again I and I feel like I have conversations with local county uh delegates all the time, too. And because they're also so very much enriched in the county, you know, because of their level and stuff like that. But um, had I not started my own business, I probably wouldn't. Again, it's funny, they were probably always in the community talking to community members, but I wouldn't have had that their visibility might not have been apparent to me had I not stepped into this. 100%.

SPEAKER_00 14:53

Because now you see them, I was like, oh, I see you everywhere now. And I'm like paying attention before.

SPEAKER_01 14:59

No, I wasn't because I didn't I I didn't need to like you know, so anyways, I think that's so cool that you're so involved with that.

SPEAKER_00 15:05

Yeah, that that was a revelation. Like I had no inkling in my mind that that would be something I would enjoy or like get fuel from. And it's like it's it's it's odd. Yeah. In a good way.

SPEAKER_01 15:16

It's like no, in a good way. And that's and that's again why I talk about again. The things that kind of that we come across, that we encounter, you know what I mean, that we end up being really passionate about. And I think it's so cool.

SPEAKER_00 15:33

Yeah, that's so that's that's been really fun. Um what else? You asked, what are the things I'm doing?

SPEAKER_01 15:41

Oh, leadership Howard County?

SPEAKER_00 15:42

Yeah, so yeah, we're I'm in the leadership county Howard County 2026 cohort.

SPEAKER_01 15:46

2026 cohort.

SPEAKER_00 15:48

They said the best class ever.

SPEAKER_01 15:49

Oh, that's let it be on record.

SPEAKER_00 15:52

Um, and that's also been fascinating. It's been getting to see behind the scenes of all of the different things that make the government work in the local government, Howard County, it's fascinating. And it's a great group of people.

SPEAKER_01 16:03

How many are in the class?

SPEAKER_00 16:05

I would be like 30, yeah, I'm gonna say it's always yeah, it's a nice chunk.

SPEAKER_01 16:10

I probably should not drop it. I've always like it's been a bucket list because as soon as I say that, they're coming. I well, they've been coming for me, but yeah, exactly. I see him everywhere too.

SPEAKER_00 16:19

You know, it's it's it's been a great point. I was also on the fence about like, ah, do I have the time for it? And it's like, you know what? I'm gonna make the time for it, and it's already like just the networking and just seeing all the stuff behind the scenes. Like, we just had the legislative day, we went down and to the post on that. Uh huh. It's it's fascinating. Seeing all the things that are available in this great county that you just don't know about because you know you're in your bubble, right? You take the kids, you got to work, kids work, and you get into this rhythm, and you sometimes you get a you you don't have the opportunity to see the bigger picture of how it all blends in with everyone, and it's fascinating.

SPEAKER_01 16:58

Well, and and again, I I hate that I keep coming back to the same thing. I think that's why I found it so fascinating of just like wow, how all these like little these little votes, these little things affect like our whole community. Yes, I I mean I I've obviously I think about it from the county level, but definitely the state level too, and then because then you know the federal things affect the count the state, which affect the county, you know what I mean? We see the the you know the effect of it kind of going back and forth, right? And and I agree, it's like when I went to um I don't remember what event it was, but like, you know, the one of the state um members coming back and giving us their update post, um, you know, it's like we're coming into that season since legislative season's about to wrap up, right? So it was like in April, like one of those um events, and they're kind of like letting us know which bills were passed and things like that. And um and it's so it's so interesting, you know, to s you know, because again, because we're both commute because we're never not a community member, but we're still, you know, so we we feel the effects on both sides. And I agree, it's so cool to see you know, once you learn it, it's yeah.

SPEAKER_00 18:02

Yeah, you can it's like you can't turn back now now that you know like And now that I know I can't unsee it. You can't. So which is which is interesting. Which is good, and I think it brings a lot of civic awareness and and little things, even like the bag tax.

SPEAKER_02 18:15

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 18:15

I never thought about that for two seconds until get the letter and say, hey, you either apply for an exemption or you owe this fee, and it's like, well, I don't have plastic bags, so I have to do an exemption every year. But these are the little laws that or the minimum wage, and it's like that affects me directly now. Now I see it.

SPEAKER_01 18:35

Like I remember, so again, like so things like that, like again, I don't I have contractors, so that's a different thing, so I don't have like full-time employees, but when I see stuff like that, like even if I know it doesn't directly affect me, like I remember reading up on that because I was like, this will, even if it doesn't affect me right now, this will if affect me. So I was like, I need to under I want to understand, and like it's fueled me with this desire to understand. Yeah, yeah, to inform myself, to not just be a person floating in the background.

SPEAKER_00 19:04

You got it, you know, and the the chamber is great for that because you get around people and you start once you make those connections, now I care about your issue.

SPEAKER_02 19:12

Right.

SPEAKER_00 19:12

Because you it's it's important to you, right? Tell me about it, and then you don't have to necessarily go read through all the 50,000 bills that are out there, but having someone in your circle that you know and care about that's affected by something, it's like direct download. Oh, exactly.

SPEAKER_01 19:28

It's like the the big one, it was I think it was last year. Um, and it might have I think it forget if it this was fed, I don't think it was federal level, but definitely state level of like um I don't remember the name of it, but the one with the restaurants with like the the the tip and uh that that was a big one because I know um what's her name? Um Trisha Hudson, who was like on you know, head head of like the restaurant association, you know what I mean? So it's like that forced me to like read up. I mean, again, I'm on the consumer side, right? But you know, that's gonna massively affect so many of the organizations that we know and love, you know what I mean? Um so it's just yeah, it's so interesting. We were gonna we were clearly nerding out so hard on the.

Illicit Massage And Trafficking Reality

SPEAKER_00 20:08

It's fun because that's in segue. I'm also in the legislative committee at the Howard County Human Trafficking Prevention Jones. So I joined that last year because that somewhat intersects with the massage board because we have a lot of what they call illicit massage establishments. Oh these illegal operations that are you know doing so many sense. And I wanted to lend my viewpoint from all the disciplinary cases that we see where we have to send to law enforcement for the local or because people still have this blinder on in Howard County. Oh, that doesn't happen here. We don't have yeah, I think we do.

SPEAKER_01 20:46

Please, please don't tell me.

SPEAKER_00 20:48

Right down the street, like in unfortunate. Don't tell me which ones, just it it's it's out there.

SPEAKER_01 20:53

Yeah, I mean that's just the real world we live in. It is, and sound like there is crime in Howard County, even though we don't like to think that correct.

SPEAKER_00 21:00

Yeah. It's it's lower than other places, but it is, but it's still here, it happens, and you know, it's it's unfortunate, but yeah, you know, so that's pretty much that's the sum of the things I'm into. I know.

SPEAKER_01 21:11

I'm gonna take that deep breath for you because it's not just like you're not just like little involved in those, you're like big involved.

SPEAKER_00 21:19

I am, and I I guess I do so many things I don't have time to really process how much right because you're you're just in it. I'm just kind of going around the case.

SPEAKER_01 21:27

Especially with your main chair for the massage, um, the board and things like that, and leadership is which is also a big commitment and blah blah blah. And you're running your business. Yes. You're running a business. Oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_00 21:41

Which is fun and sometimes not fun, but mostly fun.

SPEAKER_01 21:44

Mostly fun. I know. Well, I I've been having a lot of conversations 'cause I mean, okay, it's obviously so good to see you too, because like this time last year, it's like, well, you know, again, the market and the economy last year, which we're still very much in, it hasn't changed, you know what I mean? But like, you know, I feel like 2025 was a ride.

SPEAKER_00 22:03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 22:04

Was a ride.

SPEAKER_00 22:05

I think for everyone.

SPEAKER_01 22:06

Yeah. Everyone.

SPEAKER_00 22:07

Everyone. And we're always the first line to get hit. Where people consider it still as a luxury item. It's something that you don't need a massage to live. You need food, you need shelter, you need gas in your car. These are like absolutely it's rough right now. Like I said, we're still in it. But but I would say the save and grace, we're in a county that has more of a buffer. So people are really into their triathlons, biking, races. They move in this county, which is which is great for the business I'm in. Right. But it's still always a good thing.

Landing In Howard County

SPEAKER_01 22:51

You're not not affected. No. Oh, for sure. No. But no, I mean I I know even with marketing, like, you know, from like business budgets, that's what happens too. It's like, you know, from like you're getting hit from kind of like the consumer side, and then I get hit from like businesses that are getting um that are trimming the fact. Which again, it makes sense, right? Like, I mean, I can even agree. Like, I I slowed my my networking attendance down to like talk about It's a reality. Yeah, it's it is a reality, you know. But my next question to you was kind of like we were just starting to hint this, you know. You're from PG County, you live in Howard County, you know, talk about like you know, why you started a business in Howard County. I mean, because you're so deeply entrenched here and with how your business got started and everything like that.

SPEAKER_00 23:33

So it it was not any sort of calculated decision. Yes. A guy who worked with me at the franchise said, Hey, I have an extra room here. I need some help. Can you help? Can you cover, come in? Okay, why not?

SPEAKER_02 23:52

Right.

SPEAKER_00 23:52

And like it sounds so un um uncalculated.

SPEAKER_01 23:56

Oh, but just like that's my whole life. That's my whole life.

SPEAKER_00 24:00

This was a time, like I at the time, no, I had no responsibilities other than myself, which was an absolute blessing.

SPEAKER_02 24:09

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 24:09

So didn't have a wife, didn't have a child. I was my only responsibility. So I was like, why not? Let's try it. Because if it all blows up, then I can start over. It's not a problem. Yeah. So that's literally the calculus that went into it.

SPEAKER_02 24:27

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 24:28

Um, and I didn't know much about Howard County at that time. I'd been to the mall, we used to come to the mall with sneakers and kind of like, but that was it. And it's like, oh, this is a nice place. So then at some point I moved up from Hydesville into um off of Stevens Forest and the Autumn Crest apartments. That was my first place here.

SPEAKER_01 24:47

That's so my husband grew up in off of Kilmanjaro.

SPEAKER_00 24:50

Like right over there.

SPEAKER_01 24:52

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_00 24:52

Um, and it was a really great little place because it had the walking path that led to the lake.

SPEAKER_01 24:58

Yep.

SPEAKER_00 24:58

Um, I could walk over to Dunkin' Donuts, they put a Dunkin' Donuts there, they had a food store there, a couple ones, food line, and it left.

SPEAKER_01 25:05

Oh, I know, yep, yep, yep.

SPEAKER_00 25:06

Um, but it was a nice little area. I I felt like it got a bad rep. Like this is this is a bad place, but it's but they're right for walking that like.

SPEAKER_01 25:15

Well, you say, like, that's what's funny about Howard County, it's a bad rep for Howard County.

SPEAKER_00 25:19

Yes. And that's what I hear, and that's what I see on like, you know, this is you know, the Columbia areas are like, I don't like I'm not seeing it. I don't know if it's because of my experience growing up in PG, but like I'm like, this is nice. I'm like, I'm all like the bike paths are great, like my husband's from again, like the Oakland Mills area.

SPEAKER_01 25:42

Um, and so like same thing. I mean, again, I'm from Only, which is like just down the street, but like Montgomery has like some very affluent, and then you know, we kind of swing the other side too. Um uh and just growing up in the DC area, you know, we've seen lots of you know variations. Um, but yeah, somebody says like certain pockets of Howard County that like, oh, like that area's a little shady. I'm like, what are you talking about?

SPEAKER_00 26:05

That was my take on it. I'm like, maybe not missing something, but um again, I'm not like from here.

SPEAKER_01 26:10

I'm like, it's still like every that's yeah, that's the joy of Howard County. It's like everything, like even the um, you know, the areas that may be considered like a lesser than are still like uh still a great place to live, relatively safe. I mean, that's what's that's what gets our county from or you know, our city nominated as what like you know, top ten, safest, happiest place to live. Yeah, you know. So um and apparently run a business.

SPEAKER_00 26:35

Yeah. So I was there and for a while. Um then we shifted, where do we go? We moved off of Columbia Road.

SPEAKER_01 26:45

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_00 26:45

And I can't even think of the name of the place. It's right by the golf course.

SPEAKER_01 26:48

Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_00 26:49

It was another apartment before we bought our house. Um but yeah, no, when I came to Howard County, that was literally the reason. It was to come back and forth to commute to the office space I was renting. And then I said, I'm tired of driving 29 and 95. I know, because 29 And I said, alright, well, let me start looking for a place. And then I found a place and then, you know, I'm here.

SPEAKER_01 27:11

Isn't that funny?

SPEAKER_00 27:12

Yeah, and I love it.

SPEAKER_01 27:13

Well, and I feel like, and again, you probably know this even better than I do. I feel like for owning and running a business, let me change my words. There's uh at least we're not Montgomery County. Montgomery County, I feel like is very strict and very a very expensive place to to to live and obviously to run a business too, but I feel like there's a lot of great opportunities and resources here to own a business, to run a business, to start a business.

SPEAKER_00 27:40

I feel like this is a very business-friendly climate here in Howard County, and I think that's been intentional from um Dr. Ball and the leadership at the top of the county to make this uh a great place to do business and the support for businesses is really amazing.

SPEAKER_01 27:58

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 27:59

Now I don't have experience in any other county.

SPEAKER_01 28:01

No, same, but but from what I again like from what I hear, like again, like I feel like there's reasons why businesses are coming to Howard County um, you know, and opening up shop here versus you know, the mut you know what you're gonna pay and business taxes, you know, um elsewhere.

SPEAKER_00 28:17

Yeah, it's it's been great and the support is great. And the support, and that's that like even with the chambers and just the local business community is strong. And I I don't know, like I feel like it's it's probably the greatest place that we could have like imagined to start and grow a business here.

SPEAKER_01 28:34

Right. Yeah, so you know, and and that's what like you know, like I feel like how I got started, again, because I I don't have a brick and mortar and and things like that, um, or product and inventory, things like that, but how I got started was just you know, obviously relationships, connections, meeting people, meeting businesses. Um, and what I what I always laugh about is like I always tease that Columbia is like the most like incestuous place in the best way, in the sense that like everybody like does everything and goes to each other's events, everyone's on each other's boards. It's like when I first started, I had the hardest time figuring out who was the Columbia Association people versus the Meriwether people versus the Howard Hughes versus um Meriwether District because like they all you know what I mean, leadership, you know what I mean? It's like in chambers, like everybody goes to each other's events, everyone's on each other's boards, but that's what makes it such uh an um an interweb because we all know each other and we're well connected, and when you kind of like fabricate all those things together, it creates a really strong foundation, I feel like, in this community.

SPEAKER_00 29:39

I agree. I think everyone is connected, yeah. And more than it's surprising because everywhere, every like literally any if it's an event at the chamber, if it's an event like a multi-chamber event, it's it's like you see the same people, it's like, oh, everyone is involved. I think the involvement is the biggest thing. I think we have a really good group of business owners in the county that stay involved.

SPEAKER_01 30:04

That I was gonna say that want to be involved. I agree, I agree.

SPEAKER_00 30:08

Which is good to see because then you start to see that, like, hey, so-and-so, you're doing well. I've been following you, I've been checking you out, now I see you, and now I see you everywhere. Yeah, it's just like so weird. It's like, oh, hey, again, good to see you again.

SPEAKER_01 30:21

I know. Well, because the reality is too, is like, um, I think it's so great to, I mean, obviously we love seeing all of our business, you know, all our business partners, you know, succeed and grow and things like that, but we all need each other, you know what I mean? Like, um, you know, because there's so many, like, for instance, like nonprofits and charities and foundations, like, you know, we're all asking each other for different things, whether it's referrals and resources or you know, employees, or um, you know, uh who was I talking to the other day that like, you know, we have this event, so we're like we're everyone's always looking for sponsors, like you know what I mean. So it's like we all have to talk to each other, we all have to have good relationships with with each other because at the end of the day we all need each other just like we do on the community level.

SPEAKER_00 31:02

That's what it's all about is relationships, relationship building, maintaining, showing up for people. Yes, and just you know, being a resource and trying to help.

SPEAKER_01 31:11

I know.

SPEAKER_00 31:11

That's how I look at things.

Tokar Spa Services And Booking

SPEAKER_01 31:12

I I I couldn't agree more, and I think that's probably why we've always synced because I think that's just like you know, the core of like what I believe in and what I like to do and how I try to show up and serve, you know what I mean? Um but actually, real quick, I let me bring it back to your business real quick because I want everybody to know. Tell um before we wrap up here in a few minutes, tell us all about like the different services and offerings that you have, how people can book services, um, and what they can expect.

SPEAKER_00 31:41

I'll start with what you can expect.

SPEAKER_01 31:43

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 31:43

We are not a sterile franchise environment.

SPEAKER_02 31:47

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 31:48

We have intentionally created an intimate space that is warm, it's welcoming, it's all client-centered. Meaning when you come in for treatment, which we offer massages, facials, and we just started doing waxing, everything is custom to that client that day. So it's not like a run and gun. You come in, you go out, it's it's uh a time and attention to detail. We do follow-ups with our clients, we provide recommendations, post-visit, like it's it's a full like 360 view of that person. And we refer out a lot. So if you come in and you have something that we are literally just not capable or trained to do, we have referral partners, neurologists, physical therapists, nutritionists, podiatrists. We believe in integrating the care, and if it's not something the massage or aesthetic would help with, then we refer out to people we trust. And those people often are also our clients as well. Right, right. We have great relationships. But I would say the biggest thing, Tolkar, we're we're we're family-oriented, we're we're really looking to build a relationship with our clients in the long term, not yeah, you come in once and we don't see you again. Like that doesn't serve us, it doesn't serve you. Yeah, so we try to build those long-term relationships. All our therapists have great experience, great quality. We offer unique services, so we do a couple's massage lesson. That's one of our unique ones.

SPEAKER_01 33:21

Oh, that's cool.

SPEAKER_00 33:22

Where a couple will come in and learn from the therapist. Obviously, we're not certifying anyone. No, no, no. We're just teaching you like pick two or three areas. It's a two-hour session, but every the each person has 45 minutes to learn. Yeah. So it's hey Claire, uh, what do you want to work on? What do you want your husband to focus on? Yeah, what are your top two problem areas every day? My feet and my shoulders. And we'll show you how to work it. You get a little poster to take home, you get massage orders to take home.

SPEAKER_01 33:49

Ooh, that's so good.

SPEAKER_00 33:50

Yeah, so these like you do so many things. Loomi lo me is like a Hawaiian massage. We do a four-hand massage where two people are massaging you at one time. Whoa. We just have we like to have fun. So it's really cool. And then with the the couples massage lesson, we do workshops now. We just did our first one for Valentine's Day.

SPEAKER_01 34:08

But we want to have timing, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 34:10

Five or six couples come in and we have a whole we rent out the conference room in our building. It's fun. That's so fun. So we're doing it quarterly now. The next one is May 23rd coming up.

SPEAKER_01 34:19

Oh, we gotta get it on the calendar. We gotta get it on the calendar. Yeah, it's it's fun.

SPEAKER_00 34:22

It's like light, it's fun. We have music planned and we make it entertaining. Yeah. Um, where you can have fun and learn at the same time.

SPEAKER_02 34:29

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 34:29

Um, but we're everywhere on social, Tokar Spa. Um, the easiest thing to do is go online and book an appointment. But we you can call in, you can email, however, you know, yeah, however you communicate, we can we can meet you there. But the absolute easiest is pop on the website, yeah, pick the service you like, book now, it's all done. It's super simple. You get a text confirmation, email confirmation, all the electronic forms now. We've upgraded from paper. Oh, we're in the modern age now, so you can fill out your intake form. I know. So we're we're accessible, we're easy.

SPEAKER_01 35:01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 35:02

And we're right downtown, right by the mall. You are, you are, you're right off Brokenland. Right off Brokenland, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 35:07

Love it. And where can they find you on Instagram?

SPEAKER_00 35:09

At Tokar Spa. We're on TikTok at Tokar Spa. Love it. Facebook at Tokar Spa. So we keep it, you know, brand simple.

SPEAKER_01 35:17

That's what we love. Simplicity is key. So um, well, thanks so much for being here today, Steven. I always love getting to see you and catch up. And you know, I feel like the next one thing we didn't talk about today, which we'll just have to talk about the next time, because I fully agree is talking about like business growth and focus. And I that's been a big priority of mine, something I've been thrusting myself into. So I'm excited to see where you guys go next.

SPEAKER_00 35:39

I will leave with this. Yeah, I'm very excited about growing because I will talk about Oh, we will, we will. Um, we did some demographic study of our clients.

SPEAKER_01 35:48

Ooh.

SPEAKER_00 35:49

46.5 years old is our average client.

SPEAKER_01 35:52

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 35:53

78% female. That makes sense. So in the range of mom and um elementary, going to middle school. Yeah. That's how target client and even unintentionally, we try to make it available for everyone, but we looked at the data. But once you have the data. This is who comes in, and these are our clients. So and then it allows you to kind of kind of niche down and that's right. But yeah, we we just love what we do. It's fun. I love it. You get to meet people, build relationships, and and help people. I know.

SPEAKER_01 36:27

Well, and then again, this is why I love what I do because I always just get energized off of like hearing your story, hearing other people's story, and like I've always known you were super passionate, I've always known you're super smart, um, but you bring so much of your knowledge and passion and intention to really everything you do, but obviously your business and how heavily you're involved, you know, on the business and community level. And you know, I'm just so excited for people to know that about you and to know that about tocar because that comes into your work, you know. Thank you. Yeah. Yeah, I know, I know. Well, cheers. Cheers to that, cheers to cheers to growth this year.

SPEAKER_02 37:05

Thank you. Yeah, of course. We're growing.

Wrap-Up And How To Support

SPEAKER_01 37:07

We are growing. Thanks for tuning in to this episode of Mom Talk Maryland. If you loved it, leave a review, share it with a friend, or tag me at the.columbia mom on Instagram. I'd love to hear what you think. And don't forget to follow the show so you never miss an episode. Until next time, keep showing up, keep supporting local, and keep being the incredible mom, woman, human that you are.